love dem crazy little tings

(i wrote this last night)

yo ho ho. so what’s up? well, the study circle in Ruhi Book 2 I was supposed to tutor in Drummondville on saturday got cancelled due to widespread sickness and scheduling conflicts, but I ended up coming to Drummondville anyway to have dinner and (unbeknownst to me) get trampled by rowdy kids. That was fun. I love kids, especially uppity kids. And it seems as if they love me, because practically every time I leave after hanging around with kids, they beg me to stay. That’s the kind of thing that makes you feel good about yourself. :)

I was thinking something really cool recently. Maybe it was because of hanging around with the kids. I was thinking back to the words of Bahá’u’lláh, where He says “Regard man as a mine rich in gems of inestimable value”. Imagine how beautiful and harmonious the world would be if everybody treated everybody else as if they were a mine rich in gems of inestimable value. They’d never criticize them or get angry at them or squelch them, they’d just search and be patient, waiting for that gem to shine out from around all the rocks. Now, one of the ways we can look at that quote is in terms of children’s education (which we do in Book 3 of the Ruhi series). But something suddenly got into my head as I was driving one day, and I thought, hey, this applies to one’s relationship to oneself as well. If you’ve read this blog thoroughly, you know that I have an unfortunate perfectionist streak a mile wide. It’s one of those “vain imaginings” that everybody talks about and everybody wants to get free of. What’s the vain imagining? That I, being human (and by nature imperfect), could feel like I was a judge of perfection. My name is Hebrew for “God is my judge”. What right have I to judge myself? Or anyone, for that matter? That right rests with God alone. Anyway, I digress. When I let the judgements drop and just interact with myself in a detached, spiritual, and positive way, I find gems. I find beautiful parts of myself that I can work to improve. There’s not just faults and imperfections in me, you know. There’s a lot of strengths, gifts, and talents, too. People aren’t just rocks to be tossed around, that’s the lesson. Look a little below the surface, be patient and positive, and you’ll find some amazing things.

the 3cj had a pretty nice (albeit small) meeting on sunday morning. For a small meeting, it was still pretty good, and I felt it was productive. I don’t know why I find these meetings to be so much fun. I think it’s just been a long time since I’ve had any interaction with Bahá’í youth my age. For the past year I’ve been serving alongside great people and I’ve learned incredible things about service, but, I don’t know, there’s something special about youth. It’s a different feeling, a different dynamic. I understand youth. I relate to youth. It’s so different being around people who are going through the same things in life as you are — learning how to live, how to integrate into society, how to balance work, school, leisure, and service; thinking about getting a good job, about dating and marriage, about searching for apartments, about, well, about creating an identity for oneself I guess. That’s what’s so wonderful about youth. We’re in the process of creating this identity for ourselves and no one really knows where it will go. And we have the honour of choosing to include service to God and to humanity into this identity. One of the things that will undoubtedly be part of my identity all my life is pioneering. It comes from having parents who were pioneers, I guess. My mom and dad moved from place to place in the seventies, helping teach the Bahá’í Faith and establish Bahá’í communities all over Quebec. Identity. This is who I am, a pioneer. Someone who gets up and goes and trusts in God. Not that I’ve got trust in God down pat, but I’m definitely getting there. Anyway, I digress again. I missed being with youth. And of course there’s the social aspect as well. It’s fun to hang around people my age.

Anyway, back to the meeting. I got to take a detour through Montréal-Nord on my way home to drop someone off. That was cool. There’s a pretty, um, imposing mountain of dirty snow there. I was impressed.

And after all that, I came back home to Victoriaville and started singing with the gospel choir. It was the day-long practice run today. I ran out of breath after a while. I think I was singing almost nonstop for over five hours there :P Either that or I need to do some breath work to develop my lungs.

I think I need to talk more with my friends about the Bahá’í Faith. I’m too quiet.

I think I need to talk more in general. I tend to clam up a lot.

I think I need to be more open to other people, too. People say some amazing things sometimes, and all too often I just let those amazing things slip by without jumping on them and confirming them in some way. It’s all about the art of conversation. And you don’t learn the art of conversation if you don’t have conversations!

hey you out there, talk to me! and don’t let up until I talk back!

Man. Where am I going with all this? Well, when I left I was pretty tired from singing. There won’t be another practice for a while, due to general business, and that means that the next time I come to a practice, it’ll involve driving down from Drummondville.

Anyway, Monday was a quiet day at work. Today, on the other hand, was a pretty active day — I was preparing for a meeting tomorrow afternoon, which I’ll be animating. Yay! That’ll be fun. About fifteen people or so are scheduled to come from around the area. It’ll be a little like a reflection meeting; we’ll talk about what we’ve done so far, where we’re going, and what we intend to do to get there.

I spent my lunch break talking about food instead of having lunch, since I’m still fasting. That wasn’t my doing, though. We were making jokes about how everyone always seems to talk about food during lunch. And then we kept on talking about food, which drew more laughs. But then somehow the conversation swerved and turned to penis size and circumcisions. Which drew even more laughs, and some cringing. Is that normal lunchtime conversation for groups of married women? Well, I guess it’s a subject just like any other. And it’s probably better than bellybutton lint. Well… enh, forget it.

And finally, tomorrow morning I’ll be moseying on down to Drummondville to sign a lease for the apartment I saw last Thursday. Whereupon I’ll have a place to stay. That’ll be great! I guess I jumped on this apartment pretty quick, but hey, it’s nice. I keep on wondering whether there’s a catch, you know, whether there’s still a chance that someone else might edge me out of it. Well, we’ll see. Everything is in God’s hands. Even the benjamins.

On that note, peace.

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