through no fault of my own, I was given this life to live, these faults, these lacks, these wants. these myriad imperfections are slowly, one by one, being exposed, dug up and rooted out by the tests of God. God must want me to become real strong and really well-developed, because the tests just don’t stop coming.
it’s nice that I can be positive overall. I don’t think I’d have much if I couldn’t. I guess positive doesn’t necessarily mean happy, either, because I’m certainly not happy at the moment. maybe that’s because I have the wrong definition of happiness. it’s always best to be content with the will of God. nothing else works for the highest and best good of all concerned.
i’m not happy right now because I’d rather everything be simple and easily within my grasp. of course, if everything was that easy, I’d never progress or get anywhere. and I have a lot of progress to make. if there’s anything I’ve learned on seven months of service so far, it’s that I have a long way to go. there seems to be only one real way to be happy, and that’s to be content with what God has ordained. otherwise, there’s always some calamity that pulls you down and messes you up.
I’ll get this. It’s going to take more than just a year to get this stuff down pat. I’ll get it.