gah, feeling a little daunted today. lots of challenges. starting the study circle and trying to get everything off to a good start… waiting to start work… managing little contracts here and there… and in the meantime there are spiritual challenges as our community learns to live together. actually yesterday we had a really good experience as a community at the nineteen-day feast. it was lots of fun. so there are fun parts and there are difficult parts I guess.
It all goes so much better when you just give up all the criticism and fault-finding. you know, those things that “quench the light of the heart and extinguish the life of the soul”. it just does no good to even point out to someone that they have a certain fault. they get defensive, offended, angry, they stop being receptive, and you get frustrated because they won’t listen to you, and then estrangement grows. and of course the worst of the worst is backbiting, which completely destroys unity and shakes the foundations of a community to its core.
yeah. when you think about the faults a person has, you also get discouraged because you think “oh noooo, there’s so much work to do!” but in fact, that’s not your work, your work is on yourself. let others work on their stuff and focus on perfecting yourself. there’s no time to worry about other people’s faults. try working with what you’re given instead. find the positive and bring it out, and see how it can contribute to the overall working of the group.
I think that’s been bothering me lately, without me knowing it. I was getting kind of frustrated with some people and I kept on thinking “if only this person would change” and so on. but let’s be real, I can’t do anything to make that other person change! so I better just mind my own development, and keep doing God’s work instead of worrying about the little things.